So, say your girlfriend or boyfriend or spouse is cheating on you but you don’t know it, and a friend catches them one day, and your gf/bf/spouse asks your friend please not to tell you. Would you want your friend to tell you what was going on? What if they ended up not telling you and you found out later, would you still want the person as a friend?
And what if you happened to be the FRIEND in the same situation, you saw someone cheating but were asked to keep it a secret. What would you do?
In cases like this it all comes down to your personal integrity.
Some friends when told, may not like what they are hearing and shoot the courier pigeon! If you tell you have to be prepared to lose the friendship if only for a little while until they recover from the grief.
If you do not tell and it is found out later that you knew, and trust me when they are caught they will dob you in to take the heat off themselves, you will lose the friendship for good.
If it is a bf/gf situation tell now! Would you want your friend marrying a cheat.
The fact is you are part of it now and the other person had no right to involve you or ask for favours. Cheating is a moral crime. If they burgled another friends home would you keep it a secret?
August 9th, 2010 at 2:01 pm
Your friend should tell them they have 24 hours to come clean to you or they will tell you.
PERIOD.
Anything less is HELPING them to cheat, which means they are stabbing you in the back, too.
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August 9th, 2010 at 2:38 pm
Nope. I’d say nothing and my buddies have been warned to keep their big mouths shut. I don’t wanna know.
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August 9th, 2010 at 3:08 pm
I wouldn’t want a friend to tell me.
And I probably wouldn’t meddle in other people’s business. Things are not always what they seem.
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August 9th, 2010 at 3:18 pm
if they were a true friend they would tell you I know id do it if it was one of my friends. Just sit them down and say look I have known you forever and this is what happened and what I saw.
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August 9th, 2010 at 3:23 pm
I would want the friend to tell me. If I would have found out later then he/she is no friend of mine.
If it happened to me then I would tell that someone, it will hurt them or they make think that you are trying to sabotage there relationship but it’s better to let them know then to find out later and loose a friendship.
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August 9th, 2010 at 3:43 pm
If you are really a friend you should tell. Honesty is always the best policy. Furthermore, if it ruins the friendship, they werent really good friends to begin with. Good luck.
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August 9th, 2010 at 3:51 pm
I would want my friend to tell me, if i found out later that they knew and didnt tell me…I’d never speak to them again! TRUST would be GONE…
If i caught my friends bf cheating on her i’d tell her.
Dont tell the cheater you are going to tell because they can come up with a lie or a cover for it before you get the chance to tell the person who was being cheated on ya know?
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August 9th, 2010 at 4:24 pm
yes i would like to know and i have actually put myself in that situation where i do tell on that spouse. no im not a rat but i dislike cheaters, i fortunaltely have the balls to confront the person thats doing wrong. will i get my ass kicked probably but i still stand firm on how i feel about cheating
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August 9th, 2010 at 5:05 pm
This is a difficult one !!
If I was being cheated on… Yes, I would like my friend to tell me if she saw the Bastard cheating on me.
Now, If I were asked to keep a secret, then, I would.
I don’t like snitching, specially when it is going to break up a couple of relationships; Mine and my friends along with the couples.
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August 9th, 2010 at 5:46 pm
NO i wouldn’t because my real friend will tell me if they caught my man cheating! If i caught that person i would tell them that if they didn’t turn themself in that i would and if they dont like like it the thats on them! Friends come a dime a dozen!
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August 9th, 2010 at 6:00 pm
A real friend would tell. Unless of course you are more concerned with being friends with the cheater???
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August 9th, 2010 at 6:39 pm
No and No…..
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August 9th, 2010 at 7:29 pm
Definitely….. I’d like to be told, because otherwise that’d mean the person truly wasn’t my friend if s/he’d cover up my SO.
And if I was the friend, yes I’d tell them too……. even if they hated me for breaking the bad news….. I prefer that than having them get angry because I lied to them.
Would you answer my question? Thanks…..
http://answers.yahoo.com/question/index;_ylt=AqkOjSOD_do2cFZ0vMsKXfbsy6IX;_ylv=3?qid=20071105085116AAKEY6q
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August 9th, 2010 at 8:05 pm
I would want my friend to tell me!!! I would not want to be their friend if they knew and I have no idea at all. Thats not cool. And if the shoe was on the other foot, I would tell my friend. My friend is like my sister and blood is thicker than water. I would not let a man hurt her like that.
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August 9th, 2010 at 8:34 pm
Yes, I would want to know. I do not believe such a "secret" is a good thing. I would understand though, if a true friend of mine did not tell me..but I probably would not trust them as much as before if they told me they knew.
If iI saw one of my girlfriends spouses or boyfriends or fiancees cheating .. I would not know at all how to approach the person with what I witnessed. And I know if I did not tell them and they found out later that I knew … I know they probably would not trust me as much as before.
I would never agree to keep such a thing a secret, though. To agree to something like that would mean the person asking me to do it was asking me to be "in on it" and that would make me as bad as her or him. Horrible.
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August 9th, 2010 at 8:43 pm
In cases like this it all comes down to your personal integrity.
Some friends when told, may not like what they are hearing and shoot the courier pigeon! If you tell you have to be prepared to lose the friendship if only for a little while until they recover from the grief.
If you do not tell and it is found out later that you knew, and trust me when they are caught they will dob you in to take the heat off themselves, you will lose the friendship for good.
If it is a bf/gf situation tell now! Would you want your friend marrying a cheat.
The fact is you are part of it now and the other person had no right to involve you or ask for favours. Cheating is a moral crime. If they burgled another friends home would you keep it a secret?
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August 9th, 2010 at 8:58 pm
I would want my friend to tell him that he needs to be talking to me about it because if he doesn’t she/he will be. I would want to know. But if you would be able to see signs that something is going on.
But if you are this situation, you found someone cheating. You need to know how your friend would want you to handle it. How could you be friends with someone knowing what you know and not telling them? I don’t like keeping secrets. Especially one like that.
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August 9th, 2010 at 9:38 pm
I would be pissed if my friend didnt say anything!! And if I was the friend I would totally tell.
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August 9th, 2010 at 9:45 pm
NO WAY I am lying for someone else…no way, no how. I see lying as a compromise of my own values and integrity. This is my "friend", someone I care for and want what is best for them. I would have to find a way to tell them so as to minimize the "hurt" they may feel…I dont like to hurt my friends.
If the cheater asked me not to say anything, I would probably say.."you’d better fess up or I will". If this works, I dont have to hurt my friend and this is the best case scenario for me.
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August 9th, 2010 at 10:12 pm
A "friend" who doesn’t tell you that your spouse or SO is cheating on you is NO friend at all. Obviously, the "friend" wouldn’t be caring about your emotional well-being OR your health (risk of STDs, including HIV) by helping to hide the cheating behavior from you. How could a "friend" enable such a situation to continue? Drop the so-called friend. There are billions of other people in the world to make friends with. I wouldn’t waste my time socializing with someone who doesn’t care about me.
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